I, like many millions upon millions of people out there am just devastated over the loss of Michael Jackson. You just really don't realize how much of your life a certain person IS until they're gone. I've been thinking about him all morning. Before I went to sleep last night, I thought of him. I can't watch the TV coverage or the tributes anymore right now, because they just make me cry.
I decided to look through my archives of CDs and cassettes to get to his music. I'm sure we all have our collections. I've worn out many a Michael Jackson cassette or CD. In fact, I wore out two of the Thriller cassettes completely. So, imagine my delight when I looked through one of my storage boxes and found THIS:
Spank, brand new, and with the plastic wrapping intact. Well, damn! It's like waking up on Xmas and finding the very best gift of all. I've listened to this collection at different stages in my life, and can even remember the dates, places I went and relationships I was in while this music was pumping through my ears via a walkman. Pretty damn incredible to be able to get all that back and still have Michael in my life almost like he was even back then. I will probably listen to this tape, sing along, dance and cry all at the same time.
I identify greatly with Michael Jackson in many ways. A fellow Virgo, our birthdays are only 3 days apart. I understand his quest for perfection, excellence, and the need to do things in a way that nobody else already has or can. I strive for that every day of my life. I also understand his need to be the greatest thing amongst all of his peers or when on the stage....he was a Diva if there ever was one. Everything on a grand scale, and always a little something extra that you didn't expect. Knowing how to wow them, time after time. Your biggest competition always being yourself. Being the one that inspires others and who many want to emulate and be like.
Even in the midst of all that ego and pomp, there was a kind and generous heart, and a man who tried to spread a message of unity, harmony, love and peace throughout the world through his music. I hope that in these days after his death, people try to focus on that aspect of him. Not just the great performer, but also the kind, gentle, world conscious person he always was. I know that I will. I already miss him greatly.